Unwelcome Holiday Guests

DATE: 2021-12-22
AO: Patriot
Q: Lucius
PAX: CableGuy, Ice Tea, Shake and Bake, Wedding Singer
FNGs: None
COUNT: 5
WARMUP:
Musical Holiday Burpees – While listening to seasonal songs, PAX performed a burpee anytime the singer mentioned “bells,” “snow,” or “Christmas.” Luckily, those themes don’t come up much in Christmas music. Between burpees, PAX performed SSH, LBACs, Michael Phelps, Downward Dog, Cobra Kai, Windmills.

THE THANG:
PAX worked their way through five stations, paying tribute to a series of unwelcome holiday guests, including:
(1) Krampus – Goat-like Central European demon who accompanies St. Nicholas to punish naughty children. Krampus puts misbehaved children in a large bag, then kidnaps them. Hoping to stay off of the naughty list, PAX performed sandbag clean and throws.
(2) Jacob Marley’s Ghost – The first spirit to visit Ebenezer Scrooge on Christmas Eve, Marley appears bound in chains to warn his former business partner of the perils of not keeping Christmas Spirit. PAX performed sandbag pulls with a 15-foot chain.
(3) The Belschnickel – German/Pennsylvania Dutch figure, clad in furs, that carries switches to whip naughty children. Possibly a kinder, gentler cousin of Krampus. Best thing to come out of Dutch country other than YHC. PAX performed overhead presses with an 8-foot log representing the Belshnickel’s switch.
(4) The Grinch – Green fur-bearing creature who impersonated St. Nicholas in order to stop Christmas from coming. Dislikes music, children’s laughter, and other sounds of the season. PAX carried their cinderblocks to the top of Mount Crumpit two times, acting as the timer for the other stations.
(5) Elf on the Shelf – Santa’s red-hatted Christmas spy. Terrorizes children while simultaneously burdening their parents. Pure evil. PAX performed balls-to-the-wall and wall sits.

Repeat for another round of visits to each holiday guest.

More Musical Holiday Burpees. See above.

MARY:
20x LBCs.

ANNOUNCEMENTS:
07:00 Start on Friday. SYITG.

COT:
Holiday visits can be stressful. As you settle down for your feasts with family and friends this holiday season, try to enjoy your time with those in your company. Talking politics with that distant relative is still better than a visit from Krampus!

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