Backblasts

DATE: 2021-12-21
AO: General
Q: 2 percent
PAX: Booking, Jenner, Lazlo, Trolley, Toolbox
FNGs: None
COUNT: 6
WARMUP: SSH, Hill Billy’s, Arm Circles, Michael Phelps, Willy Mays Hays, Cherry Pickers, Downward Dog, Runners Stretch
THE THANG: Gates were closed and the Q wasn’t about to perform a B&E with a giant aluminum pole loosely tethered to an oddly shaped coupon…..so the PAX mosey’d to the field next to the general. PAX gathered around in a circle to learn the true meaning of Festivus: a non denominational holiday filled with one sided ridicule and mindless physical tests of strength.

The tradition of Festivus began with the Airing of Grievances:
The QIC had a lot of problems with a select few PAX, and now they were going to hear about it! The PAX assumed the forward leaning rest position while QIC barked the ways in which they had disappointed him over the past year. After each name was read, and an appropriate insult hurled, a merkin was performed.

As Festivus rolled on, we came to the Feats of Strength:
PAX lined up in pairs. Each team took turns carrying the festivus pole, roughly 50 yards, while the other team member did a high knee, jubilant skip alongside of him. Switching positions at the goal line. The remaining PAX performed a number of exercises while waiting their turns: Star Jumps, LBC’s, Heisman Shuffle, “Where am I’s”, Fast Feet/Get Downs, Bonnie Blair’s, Break Dancers, Jump Squats. 3 rounds trips.
The PAX then traveled to the pull up bars. Each PAX performed 10 pull ups while the remaining group observed, fondly, and performed the following exercises while awaiting their turn: Soccer kicks, Peter Parkers, Dips, Freddie Mercury’s, Break Dancers. Then 3 rounds of box jumps just to mix things up.
Short mosey to the bike racks, aka Bear Crawl arches where we…well….Bear crawled under the bike racks. 10 bike rack dips.
MARY: Nolan Ryans
ANNOUNCEMENTS: Prayer request for Hang Tran who is undergoing treatment for Stage 4 cancer.
COT: No matter what holiday you celebrate, real, or fictitious….I wish all of you and your families a safe and happy holiday season.

DATE: 2021-12-22
AO: Compound
Q: Popeyes
PAX: Booking
FNGs: None
COUNT: 2
WARMUP: a few laps around the soccer field with butt kickers, high knees, karaokes, side straddle hops, merkins, and a few more things
THE THANG: Merkins, run the length of the soccer field, SSH, run the field, SSH, run the field, shoulder taps, bear crawl, jog, bear crawl the field, squat stars, hop on one leg, job, hop on one leg the field, a couple of sprints.

Mosey to Merrifield common area. Up downs on a concrete bench. Sprint 6 stories on the stairs, run down. Sprint the uphills in the parking garage, jog the flats and run down. Mosey to the Merrifield common area. Step ups on the stairs and then elbows to knees step ups. Mosey back to the soccer field.

Spiderman merkins, sprint the field, bonnie Blairs, sprint the field, one more exercise. MARY: DMX, LBC, Big Boi situps, flutter kicks
ANNOUNCEMENTS: No compound next week
COT: The great resignation. Did you bring up what could be fixed to someone to do something about it? Feel something, say something.

DATE: 2021-12-22
AO: Horizon-Ao
Q: Poe
PAX: Infinity, Kodiak, Old Bay, Magoo, Hightower, sticks, 3 mile, Lazlo, Disco FNGs: Attache, FNG Coach Hand, Kombucha
COUNT: 13
WARMUP: Fellowship lap, interrupted by SSH, Willy Mays Hayes, Down Dog, Cobra Kai, Merkins, LBAC’s THE THANG: Mosey to baseball field
2 x Inside the Park Homeruns, sprinting around the bases
Mosey to nearby hill
2 x 10 merkins at base of hill, 15 BWS halfway up, 20 LBC at top Mosey to front of school
2 x 15 curb dips, 10 curb heel taps each leg
Mosey to parking lot
lunge walk to other side of lot
Mosey to corner
2 x 10 derkins
mosey up stairs to bike rack
2 x 10 aussie pullups and 10 count plank
Mosey to field
20 minutes of F3 Ultimate, 1 burpee when frisbee hit the deck, 50 LBCs, 25 BWS, 15 merkins for the 3 points scored

MARY: body saw, flutter kicks, ring of fire with legs held up resisting pax pushing them down ANNOUNCEMENTS: Christmas holiday Friday, workout start time 7am
COT: YHC crossed over the half century mark this past weekend; when you get to a certain age, your career is on autopilot and all your kids need from you any more is money; all you really get to choose is who you spend your time with and I choose to get up at 5am 3 times a week to spend it with my F3 brothers.

DATE: 2021-12-21
AO: Atlantis
Q: True North
PAX: Deflator, Bratwurst
FNGs: None
COUNT: 3
WARMUP: 10x SSH, bench situps
THE THANG: 4 exercise cycle, 30 seconds each, repeat cycle and mosey again (snowboard hops, high kicks, SSH, 180s, arm circles, burpees, skiing, peter parkers, calf raises, squat jumps, hat dance, mary catherines, heels to heavens, monkey jumps). mosey including frog hop indian run, bear crawls, lunges, slalom MARY: 45 seconds each of planks, crunchy frogs
ANNOUNCEMENTS: no workout 12/24. PAX posting today all out until next year. COT: prepare the way and give thanks.

DATE: 2021-12-22
AO: Patriot
Q: Lucius
PAX: CableGuy, Ice Tea, Shake and Bake, Wedding Singer
FNGs: None
COUNT: 5
WARMUP:
Musical Holiday Burpees – While listening to seasonal songs, PAX performed a burpee anytime the singer mentioned “bells,” “snow,” or “Christmas.” Luckily, those themes don’t come up much in Christmas music. Between burpees, PAX performed SSH, LBACs, Michael Phelps, Downward Dog, Cobra Kai, Windmills.

THE THANG:
PAX worked their way through five stations, paying tribute to a series of unwelcome holiday guests, including:
(1) Krampus – Goat-like Central European demon who accompanies St. Nicholas to punish naughty children. Krampus puts misbehaved children in a large bag, then kidnaps them. Hoping to stay off of the naughty list, PAX performed sandbag clean and throws.
(2) Jacob Marley’s Ghost – The first spirit to visit Ebenezer Scrooge on Christmas Eve, Marley appears bound in chains to warn his former business partner of the perils of not keeping Christmas Spirit. PAX performed sandbag pulls with a 15-foot chain.
(3) The Belschnickel – German/Pennsylvania Dutch figure, clad in furs, that carries switches to whip naughty children. Possibly a kinder, gentler cousin of Krampus. Best thing to come out of Dutch country other than YHC. PAX performed overhead presses with an 8-foot log representing the Belshnickel’s switch.
(4) The Grinch – Green fur-bearing creature who impersonated St. Nicholas in order to stop Christmas from coming. Dislikes music, children’s laughter, and other sounds of the season. PAX carried their cinderblocks to the top of Mount Crumpit two times, acting as the timer for the other stations.
(5) Elf on the Shelf – Santa’s red-hatted Christmas spy. Terrorizes children while simultaneously burdening their parents. Pure evil. PAX performed balls-to-the-wall and wall sits.

Repeat for another round of visits to each holiday guest.

More Musical Holiday Burpees. See above.

MARY:
20x LBCs.

ANNOUNCEMENTS:
07:00 Start on Friday. SYITG.

COT:
Holiday visits can be stressful. As you settle down for your feasts with family and friends this holiday season, try to enjoy your time with those in your company. Talking politics with that distant relative is still better than a visit from Krampus!