A Festivus for the Rest of Us!

DATE: 2021-12-21
AO: General
Q: 2 percent
PAX: Booking, Jenner, Lazlo, Trolley, Toolbox
FNGs: None
COUNT: 6
WARMUP: SSH, Hill Billy’s, Arm Circles, Michael Phelps, Willy Mays Hays, Cherry Pickers, Downward Dog, Runners Stretch
THE THANG: Gates were closed and the Q wasn’t about to perform a B&E with a giant aluminum pole loosely tethered to an oddly shaped coupon…..so the PAX mosey’d to the field next to the general. PAX gathered around in a circle to learn the true meaning of Festivus: a non denominational holiday filled with one sided ridicule and mindless physical tests of strength.

The tradition of Festivus began with the Airing of Grievances:
The QIC had a lot of problems with a select few PAX, and now they were going to hear about it! The PAX assumed the forward leaning rest position while QIC barked the ways in which they had disappointed him over the past year. After each name was read, and an appropriate insult hurled, a merkin was performed.

As Festivus rolled on, we came to the Feats of Strength:
PAX lined up in pairs. Each team took turns carrying the festivus pole, roughly 50 yards, while the other team member did a high knee, jubilant skip alongside of him. Switching positions at the goal line. The remaining PAX performed a number of exercises while waiting their turns: Star Jumps, LBC’s, Heisman Shuffle, “Where am I’s”, Fast Feet/Get Downs, Bonnie Blair’s, Break Dancers, Jump Squats. 3 rounds trips.
The PAX then traveled to the pull up bars. Each PAX performed 10 pull ups while the remaining group observed, fondly, and performed the following exercises while awaiting their turn: Soccer kicks, Peter Parkers, Dips, Freddie Mercury’s, Break Dancers. Then 3 rounds of box jumps just to mix things up.
Short mosey to the bike racks, aka Bear Crawl arches where we…well….Bear crawled under the bike racks. 10 bike rack dips.
MARY: Nolan Ryans
ANNOUNCEMENTS: Prayer request for Hang Tran who is undergoing treatment for Stage 4 cancer.
COT: No matter what holiday you celebrate, real, or fictitious….I wish all of you and your families a safe and happy holiday season.