DATE: 2023-04-01
AO: Farm
Q: Infinity
PAX: Matthew – Running Man, Sparky
FNGs: Buzz
COUNT: 4
F3 ULTRAKILL workout The Six Layers of HECK
ALRIGHT GUYS WELCOME TO MY WORKOUT I’M NOT A PROFESSIONAL MODIFY IF NEEDED sdkjgkdghnr. We approach the boarded passageway with the sign that saysDO NOT ENTER. Only a fool would actually ignore the warning and enter, but today we are the fool.
We enter a room when suddenly husks appear and start attacking. As if they are defending the entrance. And so the ordeal begins. Overture: The Mouth Of HECK/ warmup
Workouts: Beet pickers, little bitty arm circles, imperial walkers, Michael Phelps, and mountain climbers. Music: Unstoppable Force
After defeating the garenings of HECK we approach a door which reads “abandon all hope to all ye who enter here.” And we enter. We enter into what seems to be the surface. Green grass, blue sky, but we know better. One close look at the sky and we can see that it’s just an illusion.
BOSS: After destroying our way through that layer we finally reach the end of it. But we still got one more challenge. We enter into a place that appears to be night and almost relaxing in a strange way. But when we enter a room suddenly a killing machine breaks through a window and bows to us before starting to fight. Layer one: Limbo
Workouts: Running around the track and step ups. BOSS FIGHT squat jumps, flutter kicks, and burpees. Music: Castle Vain and Versus
After a challenging battle the machine retreats and runs away. We come out to a place with a great city below, but never ending storms. Nevertheless this layer is no different from the last and we must fight our way through.
BOSS: We walk through a tower in the sky with the city still far below when suddenly the place starts to shake and then a giant husk tears the roof off and starts attacking us. Layer two: Lust
Workouts: Glute bridges and planks. BOSS FIGHT on my count one hand punches. Music: Panic Betrayer
After defeating the beast we enter into its mouth and we are now inside of it.
We’re walking through when suddenly we hear a voice telling us to turn around or else he WILL REND US APART AND MAKE US INANIMATE ONCE MORE (wait that only makes sense in ULTRAKILL because you’re a robot) But we continue before facing this foe, the guardian of HECK. Layer three: Gluttony
Workouts: Dips and squats. FINAL BOSS OF THIS SECTION bonnie blairs, burpees, and bear crawls. Music: Glory
After going through all these layers a door somewhere unlocks. We go to this door and enter it. We enter a dark room where we make our way down until we reach another door which opens. When we enter we face the strongest foe yet, the flesh prison.
MINOS PRIME: After destroying the flesh prison it explodes, but wait something comes out of it. Well I guess you can’t have a prison without a prisoner. We have just released Minos in his prime state where he’s stronger than anything. Time for the battle of a lifetime. A short detour to the hardest bossfight: Soul Survived
Workouts: shoulder press, bench merkins (derkins), and reverse lunges. Music: CHAOS and ORDER
Like a 10 second break or something
We walk out into a bright desert with a pyramid in the distance which we will soon enter.
BOSS: we enter a room at the top of the pyramid when we see a familiar face from the Limbo layer. That machine. He doesn’t seem to be very happy most likely because we absolutely destroyed them. Layer four: Greed
Workouts: Sun Gods IC and Mountain Climbers IC. BOSS FIGHT bench jumps ups and American hammers. Music: Sands of Tide and Duel
We walk out and see a great big ocean that contains all the lost souls. After we make our way through we come across a great big ship that we go onto.
BOSS: Suddenly a leviathan made out of the bodies of the lost souls emerges out of the water and attacks. Layer five: Wrath
Workouts: Swimmers and crab walk BOSS FIGHT mountain climbers and shoulder taps Music: Deep Blue, Death Odyssey, and The Abyss and The Serpent. We enter the final layer ready for whatever we encounter.
FINAL BOSS: After that whole ordeal we enter a room that seems to be the final when we hear a familiar voice and it’s the guardian of HECK back for revenge. Of course he’s furious and the fight begins…
Mary: Sweat Angels, LBCs, and Rosalita’s.
CoT: We said the Gonzaga prayer:
It’s the beginning of a new day
God’s given us the day to do his will
We can waste it
Or use it for good
For what we do today
May change the course of our lives forever
We want to be good
Not evil
Success
Success
Success
Not failure
Knowing this
May we never forget the price we pay
Amen