Simple Snow

AO: The Patriot

QIC: Maj Payne

The PAX: Three Mile, Lucius, Fuzz, Elvis, Jenner, Brown Bag

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Lucky seven PAX gathered in the post-snow gloom after surviving the first blizzard of 2020. Temps hung around 30 degrees, which was cold enough for YHC and others to cover up the legs. The beatdown was simple, and it kept us out of the snow. Perhaps we’re all getting too soft.  Perhaps. But the beatdown was real.  Here’s what we did…

WU: SSH x 20, IW x 15, WMH x 10, Cherry Pickers x 10, LBACs front and rear x 10, Copperhead Squats x 10.

The Thang: Mosey to grab some cinder block coupons and head up to the sheltered area near the restrooms.

Pair up.  Knock out the following exercises Dora style (each PAX does half) . Then, do the burpees together (each PAX does all).

Exercise: 100 x walking lunges
10 x burpees

Exercise: 90 x Cinderblock curls
9 x burpees

Exercise: 80 x BB sit ups
8 x burpees

Exercise: 70 x Mountain climbers (IC)
7 x burpees

Exercise: 60 x Cinderblock press
6 x burpees

Exercise: 50 x jump squats
5 x burpees

Exercise: 40 x Cinderblock squats
4 x burpees

Exercise: 30 x Cinderblock Merkins
3 x burpees

Exercise: 20 x Bent over rows
2 x burpees

Exercise: 10 x Thrusters
1 x burpee

And back up…

1 x burpee
Exercise: 10 x Thrusters

2 x burpees
Exercise: 20 x Bent over rows

3 x burpees
Exercise: 20 x Bent over rows

4 x burpees
Exercise: 40 x Cinderblock squats

5 x burpees
Exercise: 50 x jump squats

6 x burpees
Exercise: 60 x Cinderblock press

Due to time (we’ll blame time…), the PAX had to stop the upward progression and move to Mary.

Mary: Flutter kicks x 20, LBCs x 20, Supermans x 20

COT: It’s always a pleasure to lead the PAX. Gratitude for those who posted in the frigid gloom today. It’s tough to post when the gloom is dark and cold, but it is those times where we feel as though we’ve accomplished something worthwhile alongside those we can truly call brothers.

Next Time, Bring a Friend

AO:  The Patriot

QIC: Lucius

THE PAX:

Bone; Brown Bag; Elvis; Fish Fry; Fuzz; Jenner; Lazlo; Maj. Payne; Shark Week; Sticks; Sunshine; Tea Party; Three Mile

Today, the PAX confirmed the best-laid plans of mice and men go astray.  YHC was expecting 16 or more PAX to post, allowing eight teams to work through a fun series of stations.  We ended up with 15 PAX … one short.  Since no-one wanted to exercise (or carry a log) alone, the PAX helped YHC adjust the stations, saving the beat-down.

WARM UP: 

SSH; Windmills; LBACs; Moroccan Nightclubs; Downward Dog; Merkins

THE THANG:

The PAX split into pairs, then carried coupons between exercise stations. Coupons included a log; a sandbag train; a heavier log; two sand-filled buckets, and a bonus tricycle.  Stations included:

(1) CB curls; CB presses; CB high-pull;

(2) 4-count step-ups, derkins; and 4-count lunges; and

(3) dips; mountain climbers; squat jumps.

All exercises performed with a smile on the PAX’s faces.

THE MARY:   

Unknown abdominal exercises; box cutters.

COT:

During recent travels, YHC visited a hotel gym.  Despite having “heat,” “lights,” and a “roof,” it was awful— with unfriendly gym goers.  This reminded YHC that it is the PAX that make posting in the gloom rewarding.  Unlike a New-Year Resolution gym membership, friendships forged by carrying coupons and lifting cinder-blocks (or even helping the Q count to fifteen) endure. Thanks for coming out.  And next time, bring one more friend.

The Indian Bearcrawl

AO: The General

QIC: Traveler

PAX: 2 Percent, Monk

Warmup:

For the last beatdown of 2019, the PAX completed sets of 19 of the following exercises:

Arm Circles, Lunge Twists, Roof Raisers, and Tuck Jumps

 

Starting at the goal line, the PAX ran the length of the field and back, ratcheting up the pace every 50 yards.

 

The Thang:

YHC thought the PAX ought to track all the progress they made this year with some benchmarks. Not sure how many we could do in 2018, but now we know where we’re at going into 2020.  

  • Merkins (60 seconds AMRAP)
  • Situps (60 second AMRAP)
  • Pull-Ups (AMRAP, no time limit) – Other PAX completed bonnie blairs while they waited

Indian Crawl: PAX partner up to complete a relay race around the track. This one was a douzy.

  • First 200 meters: PAX 1 starts bear crawling. PAX 2 drops to do 3 burpees, then runs to catch PAX 1. Switch, and repeat until reaching the 200m mark.
  • Last 200 meters: Same thing, but lunge walks instead of bear crawl. 

 

11s: PAX complete sets of Gas Pumps and Carolina Dry Docks that add up to 11, then run the width of the field.

First set: 1 Gas Pump, 10 CDDs, then run the width of the field.

Second Set: 2 Gas Pumps, 9 CDDs, run the width of the field.

Continue until 10 Gas Pumps and 1 CDD.

 

Bring Sally Up:  To the tune of “Flower” by Moby, PAX laid on their 6 and held their feet 6 inches off the ground. When the song says “Bring Sally Up”, PAX do a leg raise. When the song says “Bring Sally Down”, PAX lower their legs back to 6 inches. Rinse and repeat throughout the whole song. Spotify says the song is only 3:26…we’re not so sure.

 

Mary:

Each PAX led an exercise (reps of 19, of course):

Toe touches, Plank Soldiers, LBCs

 

CoT:

Thinking about New Year’s Resolutions and it reminded me of Bible verse from Revelation 3:16. Scripture reads: “Because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth.” 

To be lukewarm is actually a bit dishonest – to say we are committed to something, or stand for something, and then not really back it up. No one was ever inspired by a lukewarm leader. Let’s seek to be bold and firm in our resolutions in 2020, whatever they may be. That’s what will ultimately help us transform ourselves and transform our communities. Amen.

The Last Patriot (of 2019)

AO: The Patriot

QIC: Maj Payne

The PAX: Sharkweek, Jenner, Bone, Elvis, Sticks, YNAB, Lazlo

Eight PAX gathered in the late 2019 gloom for the last Patriot beatdown of the year. With the chill in the air temporarily gone, and fair temps prevailing, the PAX crushed the workout laid out before them. The following is a true story.

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First run over to grab some coupons (cinder blocks) and bring back to the end zone.

WU: SSH x 15, IW x 15, WMH x 15, LBACs front and rear x 10, Moroccan Night Clubs x 10,  Finkle Swings x 10, Copperhead Squats x 10

The Thang: The 3/4 mile dirty dozen: 12 exercises of 12 reps each with 100 yd run on track between each exercise, totaling 3 laps around.

  1. BWS
  2. Donkey Kicks
  3. 180 Jump Squats
  4. Mountain Climbers (IC)
  5. Broad Jumps
  6. Plank Jacks (IC)
  7. Jump Squats
  8. Dips
  9. BWS Kickers (IC)
  10. Bonnie Blairs
  11. Lunge Walk
  12. Shoulder Taps

The Thang 2: Farmer Carry Fun:

Round 1: Start at end zone, farmer carry two coupons 20 yds, 20 x hand release Merkins. Rinse and repeat x 5 to opposite end zone.

Then 10 x burpees, 20 x big boy sit-ups, 30 x Bonnie Blairs and finally sprint down and back the length of the field.

Round 2: Continue from end zone for 20 yd coupon carry, then 5 x BWS, 20 yd carry, 10 x BWS, 20 yd carry, 15 x BWS, 20 yd carry, 10 x BWS with coupon (cinder block squat), 20 yd carry, 5 x BWS with coupon (cinder block squat). Finally, sprint down and back and finish to…

Mary: A compilation of flutter kicks, LBCs, Freddy Mercuries, and Heels to Heaven.

COT: As we come to the end of the year, we reflect on both the past year and what we want to accomplish in the coming year.  It’s been a great year of growth, and we need to look forward to continuing to expand F3 in the Capital.  There are so many sad clowns out there that don’t even know they need F3 in their lives.  F3 changes men for the better.  It makes us better leaders, better fathers, better friends and just better people overall. The challenge is to go out and continue to bring pothers into the circle so that they can become better as well.

Aye!

 

Battle of the Bulge

AO:  The Patriot

QIC:  Lucius

THE PAX:  Bambino; Bone; Brown Bag; Elvis; FNG Fuzz; Hightower; Jenner;  Maj. Payne; Poe; Sticks; Sunshine; Two Percent; Three Mile

At 05:30 on December 16, 1944, a prolonged artillery barrage announced the beginning of the Battle of the Bulge.  German forces swept through the Ardennes forest, attempting to split Allied forces in two and to retake the deep-water port of Antwerp.  They were met by unexpectedly strong American resistance from small units scattered across the sparsely defended region. The fighting took place in horrible conditions, marked by freezing temperatures, snow, mud, and misery.

At 05:30 on December 16, 2019, 14 PAX gathered in snow and sleet to commemorate these events by performing the following exercises:

WARM UP:  SSH; Wind Mills; Arm Circles; Cherry Pickers; Downward dog; Merkins

THA-THANG:

Siegfried Line – PAX scouted the Siegfried line, running to a cinder-block, performing 3 X thrusters, then running to the next cinder block, performing 3x curls, running to the next cinder block, performing 3x thrusters, running to the next cinder block, performing 3x curls ….  Repeato.

Kampfgroup Peiper – PAX Bear-crawled the path taken by Kampfgroup Peiper from the Losheim Gap toward its objective on the Meuse River.  The PAX performed exercises at  strategic points along the German advance:

Losheim – Because German Engineers did not repair the bridge in Losheim, Peiper had to turn South.  16 Bridge-Ups.  Then bear crawl 5 yards to:

Lanzerath – A small group of Americans (18 members of reconnaissance platoon and 4 forward artillery observers) hold up Peiper’s task force for over 12 hours. 500 German paratroopers attempt to overrun the U.S. position, but are held back by the 22 Americans.  In their honor, PAX completed 22 Merkins.  Then bear crawl 10 yards to:

Honsfeld – Peiper’s column captures 50,000 gallons of US fuel, allowing the column to continue advancing.  This is critical to the German plan, as they do not have enough fuel to reach Antwerp.  The PAX refuel with  16 4-count plank jacks, then bear-crawl 15 yards to:

Malmedy – Captured US soldiers are ordered to stand in a field beside a cross-road, then shot by Peiper’s SS troops.  84 US POWs die.  Peiper’s 10-mile column of tanks continues to periodically fire into the field as it pass.  A few US soldiers survive by hiding beneath the bodies on their comrades.  Word of the massacre quickly spreads through US lines, strengthening American resolve.

In remembrance of the Malmedy Massacre, PAX perform 84 exercise counts:  4-Count Body Weight Squats (24); Single-Count Lunge Steps (20); Squat Jumps (20); Calf Raises (10); 4-count Bonnie Blairs (10). Then move on to:

Trois-Ponts / Stoumont – Peiper’s column stalls, then is attacked by Allied planes.  Because US engineers have blown all bridges between the Germans and the Meuse, Peiper’s task group cannot reach its objective.  US warplanes destroy German armor and men as they retreat.  16 Dive-Bomber Merkins and 16 Bridge-Ups.

PAX Mosey to end line for next exercise

Shoulders Hold Strong – 16 x 4-count Atlas Shrugs to celebrate the strength of the defenders on the “shoulders” of the bulge—the remnants of the 99th Division defending Elsenborn Ridge in the north and the 28th Infantry division holding its flank in the South.

St. Vith – To Commemorate the 7,000+ men lost (captured or killed) from the 106th  Infantry Division, the defense of St. Vith, the strategic retreat from the town, and the Allied counter-attack, PAX perform 106 counts of exercises:  20 4-count American hammers; 20 4-count flutter kicks; 20 Dolly-to-Heavens (4-count scissor kick; heel raise combo); 20 LBCs; 20 4-count Toy Soldiers; and 6  Burpees.

PAX performed a Burpee at St. Vith, perform 20 count of an exercise, then retreat (running backwards) to the far end zone.  To regroup and pick up the six, PAX performed Montgomerys in the end zone (4-count British “T” arm raise, followed by air-chair sit with 4-count self-aggrandizing air presses).  They then retake the lost ground and repeated the sequence.  Finish with a Burpee for 106 exercise counts.

On Dec. 20, 1946 Field Marshall Montgomery was put in charge of two US Armies on the northern edge of the battle, who could not directly communicate with US general staff south of the Bulge.  Montgomery gave a press conference describing the battle.  It was seen as self-promoting and insulting to the Americans.  In response, Winston Churchill described said “This is undoubtedly the greatest American battle of the war and will, I believe, be regarded as an ever-famous American victory.”

Bastogne – PAX formed defense perimeter around the critical intersections in Bastogne, forming an outward-facing ring.  They collectively performed 101 Merkins, holding plank as the Merkins went around the circle.

THE MARY:  U-S-A! U-S-A!; J-Los; Bicycles

CIRCLE OF TRUST:  When first meeting his generals after the German attack, Dwight D. Eisenhower stated that “The present situation is to be regarded as one of opportunity for us, not disaster.  There will be only cheerful faces at this conference table.”  With the German troops attacking, not in defensive positions, they provided opportunities for Allied forces to attack their open flanks.  Ultimately, the German attack resulted in loss of irreplaceable men and material for the Germans.

While facing obstacles this December, try to channel Gen. Eisenhower.  Look for the opportunity, not the disaster.